By: Nick the Disney Devo
Something about writing a blog makes me honest. What I mean is I find myself confessing to things I might not otherwise be honest about. Here is an example. I don’t particularly care for water rides. Sure, they are nice on a hot day. But there are the really long lines. At Disney parks, you can get a FastPass, of course.
I also don’t like water rides because of the possibility of wet shoes. These things never dry out. Sure, you say “wear flip flops.”But flip flops give me blisters. THOSE are fun during a week long vacation! Then there are wet clothes. I’m not a fan of wet clothes. Unless you wear a bathing suit or swim trunks, you are either changing, or walking around with damp un-mentionables.
So, why am I bringing up soggy skivvies? To explain why I rarely ride Splash Mountain, the “turbulent flume adventure with high speeds, heights, sudden drops and stops” at the Magic Kingdom obviously!
I love the ride. Well, I love the music and audio animatronics of the ride. I even love the drop. It’s that wet part at the end that keeps me off this attraction for the most part. But on a recent trip I decided to just do it. See what I do for our readers?!
TIP: If you don’t want to get really wet, sit in the back. Or wear a poncho. Or ride during a rain storm, you’re wet anyway, right?
Let’s go on the ride. We start out going up a hill in an 8 passenger log, seated 2 by 2. Br’er Frog is there to give us an introduction to the story.
We are deposited into a small pond at the bottom of the big drop, which offers a great view of the people about to get soaked.
You then enter a barn like structure and climb another lift where you take a leisurely ride through a tranquil river community while being lulled into a false sense of security by a gentle instrumental version of the song “How Do You Do?”
Another short drop brings us into the dark ride portion of the attraction, where “How Do You Do” is sung to us by an assortment of critters, and we see a restless Br’er Rabbit setting off, only to be pursued by Br’er Fox and Br’er Bear. Br’er Rabbit is heading to his “Laughing Place” and you begin to hear this song, as failed attempt after failed attempt is made by the Fox and Bear to capture the much quicker witted Rabbit.
Finally, however, Br’er Rabbit’s luck comes to an end, and he is captured!
You then start up a steep incline, past a couple of rather obnoxious vultures. THAT can’t be a good sign!
We then see a tied up Rabbit, about to be cooked, asking that under no circumstances should he be thrown into the briar patch!
This whole section could perhaps be a bit intense for some children. Or sensitive adults!
Upon reaching the top of the lift, we are afforded a pretty great view of the Magic Kingdom before starting our rapid decent down 52 feet at 40 miles and hour into the briar patch! Please excuse how blurry the photos are, my iPhone had a hard time adjusting to the sudden brightness from inside. I include them only to demonstrate the view and drop.
We’ve escaped the clutches of those dastardly ruffians, and are treated to Br’er Rabbit’s triumphant return and welcome home. It’s a “Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah” Day, and that’s the song you’ll have stuck in your head as you slosh your way to the exit.
My wife and I sat in the back seat, which is supposedly a better choice to avoid getting very wet. How wet did we get?
Pretty wet. My wife, who was somewhat reluctant to ride because she feels the same as I do about wet clothes got considerably damper. She was reluctant for me to take a picture, and I still get “the look” whenever I bring up the possibility of us ever making a return visit to the Briar Patch.
Again, see what I do for our readers?!